I just don't know anymore

I started typing up this post that was essentially a cry for help last night and I don't know if I'll ever finish it or get it posted.  I'm just struggling pretty hard right now and it would be so much easier I think if I was able to communicate easily with everyone back home.  I miss you all dearly and you mean a lot to me.  I'm just wrestling with some inner demons right now and it's not easy but I hope to get through this and grow from this.  I've never had a challenge like this and sometimes I just have really bad days.  Yesterday, all I could keep thinking was "I'm deeply depressed" and things only seemed to be getting worse.  Today, I'm trying to remember what I came here to do, who I am, and what I can do to take advantage of the situation I'm in.  I was supposed to enjoy this a lot more.  I don't know what comes next for me or if I'll be able to get through everything just fine because it's not easy at all but if I can get myself in a good place mentally again, I think it'll be okay.  This is crazy though but I'm trying very hard.  Wish me luck.