Still figuring things out

Originally written 15 October 2009 8:26 PM

This blog is still new and I am still new to this place so it’s very difficult to both know a certain style to write in and also to decide what to write about. You have to use a filter when describing things and choosing what to write about and mine’s obviously pretty big, hence the long posts and paragraphs that go nowhere. Also, everything is a new experience to me and I want to write out long, thoughtful posts about them but I don’t have the time right now and when I will get the time, they won’t be fresh anymore. I’ll take the attitude that something is better than nothing though so even though I can’t think of a common theme or anything for what I’m about to write about (I’m not even sure what it is yet,) I’ll just be sharing some things that have been on my mind or I’m reminded of as I type. So allow my mind to wander.

First off, I apologize once again for my lack of presence online in any form. The power and water here are somewhat sporadic and unreliable at times so yesterday I tried to get online but the power was out, taking the wireless router down with it. Also, I’ve only been able to mooch the wireless from the CIEE office which crawls painfully slow and I am only able to be there during certain times. I kind of like not having internet though as I’ve had to kill time in different new ways though I completely understand that it’s not kosher to be leaving everyone back home in the dark with regards to my status here. One thing I realized today when I was able to check my Gmail and get on Facebook for about 10 minutes was that I am living almost entirely in the place that I am at now. What I mean by that is that I operate here in a different mindset and have a different mentality than I have back home and this is the only way I am able to function here. I am accepting the present as it is and enjoying that, but to see a familiar face here would be very confusing and cause some conflicting thought patterns for me. I am even treating the girl from my Swahili class back in Eugene that is on this trip with me just like I have everyone else because I feel like it’s time to live and act appropriately to this context. This connects to internet usage because every time I am able to check up on things back home, I have to use a completely different frame of reference that doesn’t really work in this setting. It’s very challenging to live in two different worlds at once and I don’t think I’m capable of doing it or even that it should be done so I really apologize for not trying to be active in affairs back home but I hope you understand my reasoning for this.

With that said, I miss you all dearly but my homesickness has mostly been limited to one person and she knows who she is. I am really enjoying reading your comments and seeing who is reading this though. Back to business though...

So I got sick on Monday night of this week and it wasn’t really the sickness they told me to prepare for or what I expected. Basically what happened was that my body wasn’t fully adjusted to the diet I’ve transitioned to here which is a lot of rice, french fries, and ugali (made from corn meal I think). I’ll write more on the food here in the future because it merits its own discussion but these three main staples are featured in almost every meal here besides breakfast (though it’s not always excluded). With that said, my body isn’t used to high quantities and large portions of these foods and is not a big fan of processing them. I didn’t realize this was happening until too late, but I could feel all these starchy things just sitting in my stomach and refusing to take the journey out. I eat other meals and kept getting fuller and fuller but nothing ever left to go to my intestines so I excused myself from dinner on Monday saying I didn’t feel well and then went back to my room to lay down where I spent the next several hours writhing in pain that progressively got worse. I’ve had indigestion before but never that high abdomen/stomach only area that felt like it kept expanding.

When you sit alone like that in pain you tend to think of the worst case scenarios too and I definitely do not want to have to get cut open for surgery in the country or have something rupture inside me. They told me I would probably vomit from food or get diarrhea while I’m here and those two alternatives were what I was hoping for to relieve the pressure and they’re also what they give you medication for, not the opposite but I wasn’t lucky enough I guess. I eventually caved and couldn’t take it anymore so I walked with my friend to health center at about 10 PM to see what they could do. They had just about closed up shop for the night there so all they could do was give me some pills to tide me over until the morning if problems still persisted. Those of you who know me well know that I don’t take pills and never want to (except for malaria medication now, I guess) but I really didn’t care at this point so I took two magnesium ones that are supposed to calm my stomach and two pain ones that got me pretty groggy. It’s hard to tell if they did the job but I felt like I could maybe sleep now until I woke up about 45 minutes later and finally threw up a little bit which took some pressure off. To cut this overly detailed account short (I didn’t mean for it to be like this,) I am still not totally over this and much less excited about the food as I was before unfortunately. I’m trying to get more fiber now though, I’ll tell you that.

I guess that’s my first sick experience here so far and it wasn’t quite what I expected but I’ve also had a few other first experiences since I wrote last. One is that I had to take my first bucket shower. I got up in the morning on Monday to find that the water was not running (except in the sinks for some reason) so I filled up my bucket they gave us and scooped water onto myself for a shower. It actually wasn’t that bad to be honest because it wasn’t as cold as the standard shower is and I didn’t have to deal with poor water pressure. My other new experience was hand washing and air drying laundry. I also used the same bucket for this and I now have decided to hold out on wearing some socks/underwear that I haven’t worn yet for a while because they will never be as soft again once they go through the washing process.

There’s not much else popping into my head right now so I’ll just say one last thing before I run out of battery. We’ve done just about everything as a group here so far and we really stand out as 10 white people walking around together, but I really like the people in my group. I told my dad this when he called me the other day, but I think you get a different type of person who decides to study abroad here rather than Europe or Latin/South America. We all have somewhat similar interests and intentions as well as philosophies but we are still a diverse group in terms of personality. I learned long ago how divisions arise and the early times are strange because people haven’t yet figured out who they will hang out with and such, but I’m honestly glad to have met all of these people and look forward to continuing this experience with them. I can already see some animosity in the group and lines forming, but it’s not going to be nearly as severe or dramatic as an average experience in a new setting is. We still have more than a week probably before everyone starts moving back in and the university ramps up which will also be a trying time, but there has been mutual respect from the beginning and our time here so far has been overwhelmingly positive.

I feel like that’s a good note to go out on so I’ll cut this off here before my contacts completely peel off my eyes.

Have a good night/afternoon/morning or whatever it is where you are.